Gail Sheehy Live Twitter Chat with 'Your Turn To Care'

by Rubi Fregoso

On May 9th "Your Turn To Care" and author Gail Sheehy had a Twitter chat on caring for a loved one and preparing for the final stages of caregiving. Gail offered great advice on key issues such as caregiver burnout, respite care, sibling relationships and coping with grief. See below for the whole conversation.

I'm chatting with @yourturntocare at 2 p.m.PST (5pm EST)about caregiving. Follow my account and yourturntocare to watch the convo happen.
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare invite them for a fam meeting and plan it around a cheerful wknd w things they like to do...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare after the ice is broken, sit down and talk about what each of u can bring to the table...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare acknowledge that each of u has special strengths.. someone can do paperwork, or if they have heavier job responsibilites...
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare they could contribute more $ so someone can travel to see the loved one...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare someone else might have right manner to argue w insurance companies...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare if everyone feels essential, you can build a strong circle of care... #yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare the best part is this might bring estranged siblings closer, think of it as having joint custody w your fam member. #yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare don't give up your life!...#yttc #eldercare
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare you can't do this job alone, no one can.u must create a circle of care.find yourself a caregiving buddy...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare someone near by or easily reachable by phone...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare u can share experiences and solutions and relieve eachother when you hit a wall...#yttc #eldercare
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare if u have a job, hang on to it.the temptation is to think the caregiving role may be short and u can go back...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare the reality is, not so easy.u will need the income, the social stimulation, and ur own sense of identity...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare to maintain ur health and well-being while performing the difficult job of caregiver.#yttc #eldercare
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare this is the time to be most tender w yourself...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare painful though it will be u need to begin releasing ur attachment...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare the person you've been caring for is not going to come back, but you MUST come back...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare remember the things that gave u joy before u took on this role...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare listen to music, paint, write, get out in nature. talk to pple u love and trust and esp those who r spiritually grounded...
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare i've noticed that long term caregivers have an uncanny sense for when the end might come and often go away...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare for a weeks vacation to prep themselves for the pain of imminent loss.do ask for palliative care as soon as u can..#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare hospice will come in when the dr says it looks like 6 mths before the end, but u can ask for palliative care much earlier...
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare it's about living w serious or chronic illness,no 6 mth deadline, and the patient can continue w med treatment...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare if it makes them more comfortable. #yttc #eldercare
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare burnout usually happens after the 2nd or 3rd yr of caregiving...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare the sign is when you moan, "i can't do this anymore!" u must get out for at least an hour every day...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare to take care of urself.best is to visit w a girlfriend.it boosts ur positive hormones...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare if u can't get out, lay on ur back, put ur feet on the wall, and listen to music...#yttc #eldercare
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare to really refresh urself u need to get respite, u can put ur loved one in a facility for 3-4 days, often free on medicare...
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare and get out of town.go visit someone u love and trust or sit on a beach. u'll come back...#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012

@YourTurnToCare feeling more like urself and better able to be compassionate and patient.also loved one needs a break from u!#yttc
— Gail Sheehy (@Gail_Sheehy) May 9, 2012