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Bring Back Shoulder Pads

By Ophelia Chong
May 31, 2009
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shoulderpads

I had shoulder pads way back in the late eighties. Big wide ones that made a defensive tackle look weak. My pads were like wings on a 747, wide and demanded your attention because you just might get sideswiped.

I thought I looked hot, all my girlfriends had shoulder pads, and we all nodded to each other to acknowledge our mutual hotness. We even had extra pads to stick under the ones built into our jackets. We would've have made Joan Crawford weep (if she was still alive) with insane jealousy.

We stood side by side as we sashayed down the boulevard, "yes we are hot, so get out of our way", unless you had bigger pads. Then we would bow down in respect and watched you try to get into your car and not wedge your left pad out the window.

Fashion evolves and it circles back in tweeked cycles - I have seen leg warmers pop up, platforms, shiny shirts, mullets, lamp chop side burns, but not the shoulder pad. Is it because it was really just a terrible look? Or is it because it is a cost that manufacturers don't want to include into the bottom line? Are we being held back from our beloved linebacker look due to the economy? I think so. And a sure sign of a recovery will be on the runway, a plethora of eye poking, personal space challenged Shoulder Pads.

Yes, I predict that once we see those Shoulder Pads, we are at the end of the tunnel and into the light of economic recovery.

And oh, while we are at it, I would also like to bring back the poofy hair. It's time we celebrated the reason why we have sun roofs. Nothing says happy consumer like teased sprayed hair.

Image: Ophelia Chong / Girlfriends

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