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My New Year's Resolutions

By Ophelia Chong
December 31, 2008
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2009

Happy New Year! So 2009 heralds in Hope, Courage and Change. What about your New Year's resolutions? I have made my list of Ten Resolutions. Not your usual list of "eat less", "smile more" and "call home more often", but a list of internet resolutions - the kind no one really knows about except you and only you will know if you stick to them.

Resolution 1
I promise never to join another Social Network with a logo all in lower case.

Resolution 2
I will always remember to choose "Do Not Send Me Hourly Updates on Our Hot Specials"

Resolution 3
I promise never to email when I am really really mad.

Resolution 4
I promise never to send 12 mgb image files to my mom's dial up email address.

Resolution 5
I promise to stop sending cute kitten YouTubes to all my friends.

Resolution 6
I promise to hold back the chuckle reflex when I see SEO/Marketing/PR/Internet Guru on a profile.

Resolution 7
I promise not to have all my news aggregated by an aggregator and then Tumblr-ed to my Facebook page, which then sends an update to my Friendfeed which then to posts to the bouncy desktop widget on my desktop.

Resolution 8
I promise not to Tweet about the temperature of my third coffee.

Resolution 9
I promise not use "LOL" more than once a day. And never "ROFLMAO".

Resolution 10
I will put my bookmarks on a diet.

I hope to be able to hold strong on my New Year's Resolutions, if I don't I only have my insatiable appetite for the "new" and my short attention span to blame.

Image: Ophelia Chong / Delay No More

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